Beary Merry Christmas Season

Christmas Season

So it is the most wonderful time of the year.
A time to give and gather and get:)
The gathering part gets a little nutzo.
The beloved sappy Christmas movies have heart-felt family reunions that
blast against the harsh reality of many.
Oh, cynic!
The mind is a powerful thing.
Look beyond to the
magic and fantasy and faith- the spirit of Christmas.

Up and running

Look around.
many sounds...
sad, glad and inbetween.
Rise up
give up
look up.
Believe.
Point to the enemy.
say "no more"
Now you're free!

Journey....

Ok, so as you can see, I haven't gotten too far past the naval gazing faze.
Everything seems so sad and stuck and yucky right now.
The 10 Point Plan may just work!

10 point plan of action to overcome the cancer monster

1. confront the monster - say "No MORE"
2. have confidence / attitude
3. eat healthy 5 alive (5 servings of fruit and veggies/day)
4. exercise daily
5. meditate/pray daily
6. help others
7. keep update annual phyical / mamograms, colonoscopy
8. support cancer research
9. set healthy/fun goals
10. let go

Karen and me, Summer 2003.

Mom, 1995- what a woman!

I will overcome the cancer monster.
It brought too much darkness for too long.

It got 4 in my family -

NO MORE!

That's me, Daddy's girl
What a cute 5 year old!

Karen, Susie and me, Feb 2002
Karen was in the nursing home in last stages of cancer.
Susie got hit harder and faster but made the trip
from Loveland, Colorado to Webster, South Dakota
to see Karen for the last time.

Our last family Christmas, 1967
Karen Tietz Kwasniewski 6/19/1948 - 3/16/2004 (55 years)
Mom, Christine Tietz 1/16/1927 - 3/24/1996 (69 years)
Dad, Lenard Tietz 8/2/1914 - 11/2/1968 (53 years)
Susan Tietz Wild 9/19/1949 - 5/29/2002 (52 years)
Me, Marilyn Tietz Hesser 4/28/1955 - still kicking
Lenny Tietz 1/8/1960 - still the little bro

I'm back

What happens when you 'turn" 50?
Oprah did it with pizazz...
I crashed and burned.
Red hat society?
Please not yet, almost....
Gotta get beyond me...
any suggestions?

Hope for a new vision

Looking beyond fear to hope.
Believe that all things are possible?
Now faith is the substance of things hoped for, the evidence of things not seen - Hebrews 11:1
The old at heart are tired and cynical.
The spirited and energized are renewed with each breath.

Way Beyond Me

Courtesy of nasa.gov. way cool web site
to star gazing

From naval gazing to star gazing

From naval gazing

Dawn

Dawn came to visit in a dream last night.
Back from death to reassure me of forgiveness.

Enough introspection. Time to move on.

To places and people that expand our horizons

Dale and me.

Who am I and What do I want?

"Who are you? What do you want? Who are you? What do you want? Who are you? Who are you?" -- Sheridan's dream in Babylon 5: "Whatever Happened to Mr. Garibaldi?"
That's me in the photo above with Dale 1996, at our wedding.
Who am I and what do I want?

Ageless

Back to the Curriculum Module on The Aging Process
(Click the above word "Ageless" for the reference.)
"Moreover, interviews with older adults themselves have found that individuals' own self-images seem to change relatively little as they age, leading some anthropologists to posit that the self is essentially "ageless."
Au contraire! "Who am I?" is the ageless question. What if I still don't know? What if I'm a seeker? What if I don't have a good self-image? Do I have to quit believing that I can be better? That my perception of self might be one day be better?
Do I let go and accept me the way I am? Why is that so bad?

Aging and Almost 50

I am having cataract surgery on Tuesday Jan 11. But I'm only 49. Ok, almost 50. So I found this most excellent Curriculm Module on aging. What the heck happens to the human body?
"Changes in Vision: Beginning the fourth decade, the pupil begins to decrease in size and in response time to light. Because of these changes, it is estimated that older adults require three times the amount of illumination to see as a younger person. Also, focusing takes longer with an increase in nearsightedness, making small print harder to read. Another normal change is thickening and yellowing of the lens of the eye. This results in light diffraction, increased sensitivity to glare, decreased depth perception, and more difficulty distinguishing pastel colors, especially blues and greens. Non-normal changes of the eye include cataracts or significant opacification of the lens, glaucoma, and various retinal disorders such as macular degeneration and diabetic retinopathy. "

So I'm non-normal. And that's a good thing?

Another interesting passage:
"... Moreover, interviews with older adults themselves have found that individuals' own self-images seem to change relatively little as they age, leading some anthropologists to posit that the self is essentially "ageless." "
This calls for a blog of it's own. Next entry....

Inner Beauty

After tai chi class tonight, while driving home a pervasive thought bopped into my consciousness (or more like semi consciousness after work on the first Monday of 2005).
The thought: Embrace the beauty within.
Struggle with "personal value"? I use quotes as all other related terms are over exposed and meaningless. I remember thinner days, when I was able to run 7 minute miles, with each thump I would mantra "I am beautiful".
Beauty: the quality or aggregate of qualities in a person or thing that gives pleasure to the senses or pleasurably exalts the mind or spirit; loveliness Merriam-Webster.
Then I found Terri McPherson's web page with a soul-healing message: "Inner beauty isn't mushy or gushy or fluffy or fuzzy. It doesn't need compliments, recognition or reinforcement to be beautiful. It is an Almighty force - alive and beautiful - that moves you on an upward road every minute of every day of your life."
Thank you, Terri.

Weight Loss Ideas

Also in Woman's World Magazine 1/4/05 pp 16-17
(Some good ideas, I'm going to try)

1) Add 1/2 tsp cinnamon to ordinary food - studies show cinnamon causes the body to metabolize sugar 20 times faster, resulting in more stable blood sugar levels. Stable blood sugar has been found to reduce hunger and reduce production of the fat-storage hormone insulin.

2) Eat fish, the high-metabolism protein. This article states that fish can increase metabolic rate by as much as 70%. Fish also bolsters the appetite-reducing hormone leptin.

3) Block calories with mega doses of fiber. 36 grams of fiber a day blocks about 130 calories a day. Fiber expands in the digestive tract, triggering the release of anti-hunger hormones and makes you fill full.

4) Unlock your fat cells with dairy. Diets low in calcium causes the production of calcitriol, a hormone that actually hoards calcium in our fat cells and makes it harder for our bodies to break down fat. The more dairy you get, the more readily fat is released says Stephen Gallo Ph.D. from the Institute for Health and Weight Sciences in Manhattan

2005 Predictions

Taurus. That's me. Not that it matters, but I am always looking for an encouraging word and I found one here:

"GOOD TIMES AHEAD You'll feel more confident than you have in years, as Jupiter transits Libra through October 26th. In fact, Taureans have the Midas touch this year! Those who've struggled with their weight will find success. And in the first half of the year, you'll make long-term goals, upgrade job skills and become prominent in your community.
ROMANCE, FUN & FAMILY Venus, the planet of love, transits Taurus from April 15th to May 10th making this a great time for single Taureans to date, date, date! Married couples will rekindle their passion. This year is about finding love in your everyday life, so don't be afraid to tell family and friends how you feel about them. In fact, all that extra TLC you've been giving your family will pay off in a more ideal home life.
LUCKY YOU! Looking to make a big career move? Wait until after July 28th - that's when Mars begins a 5-month transit of your sign, bringing plenty of success on the job. If you feel like taking a risk especially in contests or lotteries, the stars bring luck your way this year. Find a partner, and your odds of winning double after October 26th, thanks to Jupiter in Scorpio." (p 24 Woman's World Magazine 1/4/2005 - Gerald James Jackson