Sometimes you feel like quitting
giving in to giving up.
A woman I saw today was living in the pain I felt.
The pain of experiencing great loss
the end of a dream
the end of a life.
Depression is too clinical and not the right word
to describe the crumbling of everyday life as we know it
It should have been me. I wish it was me. I don't want to get up.
Why did this happen to me?
Only bad things happen to me. It's all I deserve.
Gone is the remainder of a shaky self-esteem.
There are no answers.
Cognitively there is but emotionally there really isn't much of a reason or hope.
Goals? Career growth? Healthy relationships?
I don't think so.
Managing to get up in the morning and fake the life that needs to be lived
takes all my energy.
Life beyond the pain?
Is it possible? Are there possibilities?
God? Spiritual Growth?
not in the depth of this anger and fear.
God?
Yes, in the depth of the anger and fear.
Life beyond pain.
Life has been lost.
New life has been given.
Others move on.
Life beyond pain.
Some days.
More often now.
Time is not set. The length of the minutes, hours, days, weeks and years varies.
Sometimes it's forever and sometimes just yesterday.
Need to help someone else.
Still trying to help myself.
Life beyond pain.
in time.....
